5 Common Growth Challenges
in Business and Life
Episode Summary
Have you ever tried to make changes in your business, professionally, or personally — only to have it blow up in your face? This episode is your guide for what happens after the initial momentum: when the plan breaks, emotions spike, confidence drops, judgment shows up, or your goal changes mid-stream.
You’ll learn how to recognize these moments as part of the process (not proof you’re failing), and how to re-anchor to a guiding compass so you can keep moving forward with clarity, resilience, and smarter decision-making.
In This Episode, You’ll Learn
- How to recalibrate when goals are missed, changing, or no longer right
- How to reframe setbacks as data, not a verdict
- Why big uncomfortable feelings can be normal signs of growth
- How imposter syndrome often signals a new level, not incompetence
- What to do when success triggers judgment and minimization
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Transcript
Welcome to the Pocket Ninja Podcast, where big picture wisdom meets practical tools.
Have you ever tried to make changes in your business professionally or personally, only to have it all blow up in your face? Maybe you start strong, you’re learning, you’re taking on bigger challenges. Things feel amazing. You’re on fire, you’re making progress, and then boom, the bottom drops out. Your perfect plan becomes no longer perfect because you hit a wall. With unexpected criticism where you feel way over your head. When excitement turns to doubt, you start wondering if this great idea, in your head, is even possible. If you’re up to big things, growing, changing, trying to improve things, then inevitably you’re gonna run into challenges that you weren’t prepared for.
In this episode, I’m breaking down the 5 common challenges that show up when trying to grow and change, and more importantly, what to do when all that happens so you can navigate the challenges instead of giving up. By the end of this episode, you’ll be able to identify common challenges when they happen so they don’t feel so personal. You’re gonna be able to see how to turn these challenges into opportunities instead of letting them stop your progress. You’re gonna be able to make smarter, faster decisions when growth gets challenging, and you’re gonna feel more empowered to take the next step, even when it doesn’t go as planned. Lastly, it’s gonna transform the way you think about setbacks and be able to use them as fuel instead of stop signs. So grab your notebooks because this is noteworthy.
This is such an important topic if you’re gonna spend your life growing and changing, and since you’re here, I assume you are. This shows up so much in my coaching, and I specifically design all my coaching and workshops with businesses, professionals, and individuals to account for this inevitable problem, which is often when we make change, we grow. Things can, you know, sometimes take off and go really well, but inevitably we run into a roadblock and we need to be able to get through that to keep growing, and so I teach my clients about these 5 problems that can happen when you are advancing things so that that way you can keep going because.
When something doesn’t go right or doesn’t feel right, doesn’t mean it’s wrong. And that is hard to remember in the moment. So we’re gonna take a look at these 5 challenges so that you’re better prepared when they show up and you know what to do.
In a future episode, I’m gonna deep dive into the change curve, but for right now, I just wanna make 1 point about the change curve. And the change curve is this emotional rollercoaster that every organization, team, individual goes through when we’re going through change. Even if it’s positive change, and the rollercoaster looks exactly like that, where it starts at a certain level, it often goes down and then up. There’s always a dip no matter how good the change. So these 5 challenges are some of the challenges that happen in the dip, and I wanna tell you about them now so that when they show up, you can recognize them, not be discouraged by them, and also are better prepared to know what to do.
The knowing about these will help you get through that dip part faster and easily, and hopefully prevent you from giving up.
So let’s start with challenge #1. It just doesn’t go well. So this can be right away, a little bit later on, but eventually there is a failure. What often I say to my clients is it blows up in your face. So what happens is we go out and we take the action, we try the thing, and it doesn’t go well.
We fail, we get resistance, we get criticism. It’s a total bomb. So here is the way to think about that when that happens. Just because it didn’t work doesn’t mean we were wrong. It means the execution wasn’t effective, not the idea was wrong. So we don’t want to identify with the failure. We want to identify with our commitment or our vision. Why were we trying to do this? Even if it wasn’t effective, why were we trying to do it?
And we wanna look at this setback, not as a confirmation of how we were wrong. Not as we might say, as a verdict, but as data. It’s like, okay, that was a bit harder than I thought, or that was not what I expected. I see this a lot in change management, like when an organization is going into it to create a change. So they go into the announcement and they think everyone’s gonna see it so positively, and then they’re met with nothing but like questions and criticism and concern, and it takes them by surprise. That is data. What it means is, oh, these people need a lot more information and understanding before they’re ready to take on this change.
I misunderstood how much this was gonna take. And so, yeah, maybe I need to spend more time on helping people adapt to the change, right? We don’t wanna abandon our commitment or our playbook. We want to return to it. Okay, so here’s what to do when this happens.
#1, ideally you’re operating from a playbook, not a plan. If you haven’t listened to the playbook episode, you can go back a few episodes where I talk about the differences between a playbook and a plan, and the advantages of a playbook, and the problem with plans.
The problem with them is as soon as things don’t go according to plan, we wanna throw out the plan. Playbooks are better for that. So when something doesn’t go how I want it to go with my personal playbook, I go back and I look at my values, my strengths, and my goals, and then I’m like, ugh, that didn’t go well.
Okay. What values can I bring into address the situation? What strengths can I use to address the situation? And what goals do I need to keep pushing towards, right? So I have something I can realign to.
So when things don’t go well, go back to the playbook. Go back to the bigger thing you were trying to do. Adjust the tactics, not the overall goal. So you are trying to accomplish something. How you did it didn’t work. Work on improving the how, not changing what you’re trying to achieve.
Then another thing you wanna do is practice skills. Tools without practice doesn’t work. And I do coaching and workshops on feedback giving and receiving feedback.
And often, you know, we go to give feedback, it doesn’t work, and it’s ’cause we haven’t practiced. So we wanna practice. You know, giving the feedback. We wanna practice explaining our change to someone. We wanna practice hearing what people’s resistance might be and sitting with it and not reacting, or having some ideas on how I might respond.
Because if you don’t practice it, it’s gonna be very hard to do in the moment.
Then another thing that’s really important to do when you’re trying to implement change in your organization, business, or with yourself, is to track wins and lessons learned.
And again, almost every client I work with, we incorporate this into their package and try to make it a weekly ritual because tracking the wins and the lessons is what’s gonna help you keep going, where you can see where things are working, even though they were hard or didn’t feel good, and then where we can improve and grow.
So that’s what to do when things just blow up in your face.
Challenge #2 is you go and do something in alignment with growth and change, and maybe it goes fine, but you are flooded with all these uncomfortable feelings. Maybe shame, guilt, fear, embarrassment. And this happens a lot when we take big, bold steps that we haven’t been taking before ’cause we’re growing and changing.
I see this a lot. For example, I’ll be coaching a client where we develop their value system and then they go out and they take next-level actions that are in alignment with their value. So they set a boundary, and let’s say it sort of goes fine, no one reacts, but then they’re overwhelmed with all this like guilt and shame and like, oh, the audacity that you would do that.
And those feelings are coming up because you haven’t set that boundary before. So there is actually a backlog of those feelings that you haven’t felt before, that you’ve avoided in not setting this boundary. And also you don’t have a lot of skill or muscle around these feelings and setting this boundary.
So we’re a little bit weak or backlogged in the feeling department.
So I set the boundary and then this whole wave of guilt comes over me because I’m so concerned that I’m not appeasing the other person.
These are feelings I maybe should have felt before when I set boundaries, and they would’ve been smaller. But because I didn’t set boundaries so many times, I have this backlog of all the guilt and shame I would’ve felt in like micro doses if I had set boundaries all the way along. Right? So there’s this like flooding in of this backlog of feelings. That’s why it’s so overwhelming.
And then the other thing is I’m just not experienced in feeling guilty or shameful for maybe disappointing people or not pleasing them.
So you’ll get this overwhelm of uncomfortable feelings and that’s okay. Just because I feel not great on the inside doesn’t mean I’m not doing the right thing on the outside.
So here are the key mindset shifts.
Big feelings will likely show up in new actions. That is normal and expected because we are not practiced in this, so we don’t have the emotional skills yet that will come as you do it more.
Negative feelings do not mean we’re doing something wrong. Negative feelings can mean a lot of things, but they don’t always mean that we’re doing something wrong.
Feelings are information, not instruction. So discomfort often means that growth is happening. The discomfort is what you’ve avoided in the past and is what’s needed to grow at this level.
I always say we wanna take our feelings seriously, not literally. So those negative feelings have something to tell me, but it might not be the literal thing that I’m feeling. So if I feel guilty for setting a boundary and I feel very guilty about that, there might be something to learn from that feeling, but it might not be, literally, I should feel guilty. Right?
So what to do when we have this overwhelm of emotional feelings when we do something new is sit with your emotion and see what it’s teaching you.
The 2nd thing you wanna do is, again, anchor back to your playbook. Anchor back to your values, your strengths, your goals. Anchor back to your mission, your intention about why you did that. And then don’t let your emotions knock you off course.
Challenge #3, you get successful and then you’re overwhelmed with imposter syndrome. So this happens to so many of my clients, and myself included. Often I work with clients, they get a promotion, they’ve leveled up, and then all of a sudden in that new role, confidence dissipates and they’re completely overwhelmed that they are suddenly not qualified, overwhelmed, exposed, in danger, right?
The confidence drops, the feeling of progress drops, the feeling of success drops, and all of a sudden we’re in a space where we feel vulnerable, scared, and that we’re not going to succeed here.
So here’s the key mindset shifts.
Every new level means you’re at the bottom again. And I just think this is so important in growth is, I like to look at it as a video game that, you know, I’m in level 5 and at the end of level 5, I am so good. I know where all the holes are, I know where all the treasures are. I can play this game so well and have fun doing it and even slay the dragon at the end of that level. It feels so good.
And because I’m so good, I now move to the next level, and in level 6 at the beginning, I am terrible. I don’t know where the holes are. I don’t know where the treasures are. I can’t even make it to the end to slay the dragon.
Right? So here is the thing about that is every time we take big leaps andPTX. It won’t let me. and bounds, we are at the top, while also at the same time we become at the bottom. There’s another great saying that is the ceiling becomes the floor. So the height of what you were doing before now becomes the baseline. So your win, your success of achieving the next level is now the main floor, and you gotta build from there.
So when it feels like, oh my gosh, I was riding high and now it’s way over my head. No, it just means you’re at the next level. So you’re still at the top, but you’re in a new level. So it feels like the bottom, and you just gotta work up to feeling like at the top again.
Then of course you’re gonna advance and then go through that process over and over and over again, right?
So this discomfort does not mean incompetence. When it feels like you’re an imposter, it’s a sign of growth, not failure, or like you’ve gotten into something you can’t get yourself out of or you’re not qualified for. That’s not true.
And the only way to avoid imposter syndrome, I think, is to never grow and change. So the mindset around it, I think, is to just accept it’s always gonna be part of the process. Like when I advance, doubt is going to creep in and that’s okay ’cause I can identify the doubt as the indication that I am growing and leveling up.
What to do when this imposter syndrome comes up? Identify it and recognize it’s part of leveling up. Every time you level up, it’s likely going to get uncomfortable and feel maybe you’re a little bit over your head.
And again, we’re gonna always go back to our playbook and our tools to find out what things we can use to start building skills and finding stability and comfort again.
And we wanna notice the discomfort without letting it define us. So re-anchor in your values, your strengths, and your goals, and accept that growth feels uncomfortable.
Challenge #4. This is a really interesting one. I love talking about this one, and this is judgment.
So what happens when you’re really successful? In the way you’re trying to grow and change, it’s working and you’re doing great, and people start to judge and criticize you like, oh, well, that must be nice. Oh, your life is so easy. This is one of my favorites. Oh, you’re so lucky.
And that can be so minimizing and offensive to your success when other people bring up this judgment around your growth and change.
And so here’s some key mindsets to deal with that.
#1, there are gonna be people who don’t understand your path and you can let it go. And again, judgment doesn’t mean you’re wrong. And being misunderstood often means you’re being authentic.
In fact, I am at the point now where I sort of love being misunderstood because often it means I’m on the right track when people so don’t get what I’m doing, or more importantly, don’t agree. I’m like, mm-hmm. I must be really doing something in alignment with myself if it’s not what everyone agrees with.
You never want to replace, and you never wanna substitute someone else’s judgment for your own. Even if they have a judgment about it, I don’t wanna take their judgment over my perspective.
So what to do when you get this judgment?
#1, I noticed in the past I used to get really defensive. I remember a time in my life where I had worked really hard. My life was super great at this time period. It looked easy and fun and so successful, and a lot of people were looking at me and going, oh, must be nice. Your life is so easy. Your life is so fun.
And I was getting like all defensive, like, no, it’s not, and you have no idea.
And then I’m like, wait a minute. That’s not true. My life does have a lot of ease. I am successful. It is fun. Why am I trying to pretend it’s not.
So one thing to do is to agree. So now lots of times when people go, oh, must be so nice, I go, thank you. It is nice. It really is nice. Oh, your life looks so fun. Thank you. You are right. My life is really fun.
One thing to do is to accept the judgment. If it’s true, and agree. I don’t need to defend my life being great and trying to convince people that it’s not when I’ve been working to make it great.
So if it’s someone who doesn’t matter to me, I agree and move on.
Now, if it’s someone that really matters to me and I just want them to see the whole story and acknowledge the whole process so they’re not minimizing me, what I will say is I will ask to be fully seen. So I will say, thank you so much. Yeah, you know what? You’re right. This is so fun and joyful right now and I’m really enjoying it. But I wanna make sure that the whole picture is acknowledged and that I worked very hard in several ways.
And I might say, oh, when I did my master’s degree while working and 2 jobs and this and that, you know, and the different choices I’ve made to make it this way, that I’ve worked at it and I did things to have this. So I just wanna make sure the whole picture is there and that you see me fully.
And so I appreciate you noticing that things are more joyful and easy for me, and I also want you to see and acknowledge the work I put in to make that happen. So thank you for that. Right?
So when that judgment, when that criticism comes in, we can acknowledge it. We can disregard it or we can share authentically about it, but we don’t wanna use the judgment as confirmation that we’re doing something wrong. We can use the judgment actually as confirmation that we’re in alignment and that can be enough for us. Or we might wanna share a little bit more about our story.
Okay. Last challenge #5. And this is around unmet or changing goals. So when we set a big goal for ourselves and the goal doesn’t happen, or actually we change our mind in the process, as we pursue that goal, we realize, oh my gosh, this isn’t the right goal. Right?
Often when this happens, we feel like we’ve failed in growth and change, and that’s not true.
Setting goals, and that’s not true. Here are the mindset shifts we wanna think about when goals don’t happen like we hoped they would.
#1, missing a goal does not mean we failed. Often, early goal setting, when we’re early at doing this, we’re often very inaccurate. And as we get more practice in setting and going after goals, we will become more accurate in setting the proper goals in the right timeline, right? And this is a process, it’s not a 1-time thing.
And goals really, in my opinion, are a tool more so than a destination. What they do is they get us moving. They get us on the path so we can start learning the things we need to learn that will help us get to our goal or give us information we need to change our goal.
So we don’t wanna just change our goals willy-nilly. No. What we wanna do is we need information. So sometimes as I go down a path where I thought 100% this was the goal, I get information I didn’t have before that makes me realize, oh, the goal needs to be much smaller, the goal needs to be much bigger, the goal needs to be on a different track. I need to achieve it in a different way.
So the mindset is when we don’t meet our goal or we need to change our goal, it’s not a failure of planning. It is our learning the process, which we will get better at, that will make us more effective at goal setting.
And regardless, just chasing goals, whether we achieve them or not, is going to help us grow and change.
So what to do when we don’t meet our goals or we change our goals, is to reassess your goals through your playbook of your values and strengths, so that you can determine whether we need different strategies to achieve the goals, different timelines, or maybe for reasons we learned in the process, this goal is no longer applicable.
Then we can decide whether to keep, refine, or reprioritize this goal, and we can adjust the tactics instead of just quitting. So we need to use rhythms like weekly, monthly, quarterly, and annually check-ins so we can recalibrate the goals. Stay committed. Refinement is part of the mastery.
So that’s 5 common challenges that often come up when we’re pursuing our goals and dreams and trying to grow and change living in alignment. Living big, living daring, going after true fulfillment will be messy. It’s going to include failure, discomfort, doubt, judgment, and recalibration.
The work isn’t about avoiding setbacks. It’s about getting back up and getting through.
You wanna keep returning to your values, strengths, and goals. Look at what mindsets you need to have to succeed. What tools you have that you can use, ones that might be missing that you wanna bring in. And then practice, practice, practice. That is what’s gonna make the difference.
So that’s a wrap for this episode. I hope that you push yourself to grow and develop, and when it becomes challenging, you now have some more tools to persevere.
And before you leave today, I want to ask you, what’s your #1 takeaway from this episode? Take a moment to identify a key learning that’s changed or expanded your mindset, that’s given you a new tool or something to practice.
I want you to pause and really think about this because this podcast is about helping you get real results in your life.
My takeaway from this episode, don’t forget about the dip. Just because it feels bad or because something didn’t work out first doesn’t mean it’s wrong.
And the other thing is that you really need a guiding compass to go back to, or you’ll get lost or get off course and you’ll never get back. It is not only about knowing where you wanna go and how you get there, but most importantly, the key that unlocks successful long-term change in growth is the understanding that you’re going to need to develop and continually practice new skills that feel very uncomfortable, very messy until they work, and that will get you to the next level, and then you’re gonna have to do it all again.
So keep trying, keep learning, keep growing.
Ready to go deeper and get clarity on your next level?