Make Better Decisions With Clarity
Episode Summary
ndecision isn’t the real problem — lack of clarity is. In this episode, Jehanne Marie Burns breaks down why capable people get stuck in decision paralysis and decision flip-flop, even when they “know” what they want.
You’ll learn the 2 most common decision-making mistakes that quietly drain your power: lowering your clarity to match your comfort level, and crowdsourcing decisions until your clarity gets clouded. Then Jehanne shares a grounded 4-step method to make tough decisions with more commitment — without outsourcing your judgment.
If you’re ready to stop spinning, stop delaying, and start making decisions you can actually stand behind, this episode gives you practical tools to create clarity and follow through.
In This Episode, You’ll Learn
- What it means to commit to clarity and close the gap
Why lowering your clarity keeps you stuck - How clarity creates a “gap” — and why that’s the point
- Why crowdsourcing decisions increases doubt
- A 4-step method to make difficult decisions
- How to consult 1–3 aligned advisors the right way
Ready to Activate Your Inner Ninja?
If this episode sparked something in you and you’re ready to ignite your inner ninja in your career, business, and personal life, book your complimentary Clarity Conversation — your inner ninja will thank you later.
Transcript
Welcome to the Pocket Ninja Podcast, where big picture wisdom meets practical tools.
Do you struggle with making decisions? Even when you think you finally decided, doubt creeps back in and you can never settle on what feels right. If you’re in an endless cycle of second guessing yourself. If you experience decision paralysis or decision flip-flop, this episode is for you.
Here’s the truth that most people miss. Indecision isn’t the problem. Lack of clarity is. In this episode, I’m breaking down how to use clarity to stop second guessing yourself, make decisive and committed decisions, and take bolder actions. So if you’re done spinning and doubting and delaying making decisions, you’re gonna love this episode.
Hi, I’m Jehanne, and I’m the founder of Pocket Ninja Strategies. I exclusively coach and train ninjas, and I’m not talking about martial arts. I’m talking about people who are ninjas in their [00:01:00] personal and professional life. And here at Pocket Ninja Strategies, we define ninjas as people who are driven by 4 powerful forces: daring dreams, purposeful learning, courageous transformation, and bold action taking, even if they don’t know yet. So if you’re here, it probably means you’re a ninja.
Let’s get into how to make fast and committed decisions. In the previous episode, I talked about what clarity really is. Clarity is the quality of being easy to understand. But when it comes to tough decision making, we are not able to make those decisions because they’re not easy to understand, right? So today I wanna share with you 2 very common decision making mistakes and what to do instead.
All of this took me way too long to learn, and I did it mostly the hard way. So I’m happy to be able to share it with you today, hopefully to save you some time and some pain.
The first common [00:02:00] decision making error is lowering the clarity. See, clarity is a superpower. So when we get really clear, that means we have something powerful, something great in mind, which also means we’ve likely created a gap.
There’s a possibility — what clarity shows us — but then there’s where I am, and sometimes it feels like the Grand Canyon between the two. Clarity often creates challenge. That’s the purpose of clarity: to get us to a higher level, to compel us to move forward. But the challenge of the clarity gap can be so scary, and what we often do to face that fear instead of rising to the challenge is we lower the level of clarity.
This is the first mistake. We never want to lower the level of clarity because of fear or because we don’t know how.
For example, you might get really clear that you wanna start your own business, or that you wanna move, [00:03:00] or that it’s time to end a relationship, or to take your career to the next level. But then that clarity creates some big challenges. You don’t know how to accomplish this. There might be a lot of risk.
It might be difficult or complicated. It might come with some costs. So instead of facing that gap created by the clarity and working to close it, we tend to just lower the clarity.
We might sort of make excuses like, well, maybe now’s not a good time to start a business, or moving’s just too expensive, or I don’t think this is really gonna be worth it. Maybe I won’t end the friendship. Maybe we’ll just hang out less.
Now we’ve lost all the power that clarity was trying to give us by lowering it to something else. So clarity raises the level of challenge in our life because it’s supposed to. It’s our goal to grow, to change, to rise. But instead of facing the challenge and the discomfort that goes with it, we lower the clarity to match our comfort level. [00:04:00]
So what to do instead? Never bow down to the challenge of clarity. In one of my favorite books, Untamed by Glennon Doyle, she says our pain is alchemy that turns us into gold, and if we miss our pain, we miss our becoming.
She also says, I see your fear and it’s big, but I see your courage and it’s bigger.
So the key is that as uncomfortable as clarity might be, no matter how big the gap, or how hard the truth, you wanna stay in that clarity. The clarity effect works if you work it because clarity can compel and propel you if you use it.
So never lower your clarity. You can use the 4 driving forces assessment to see where you’re stuck. Use clarity as the ultimate agent of change, as it points to you what you most need to know and where you need to grow.
Your job is to listen and follow through.
The [00:05:00] second most common decision making error is crowdsourcing your decisions. When we have difficult decisions to make, lots of people start asking everyone what they think about it. Talking to everyone clouds your clarity.
You’re looking for the right answer, trying to be safe, but difficult decisions do not have an objective right answer. It’s about what works best for you, what your level of risk is, what you value, what makes you happy, what consequences you’re willing to live with.
The answer to these questions cannot be found by anyone else because they are not you. They are not living your life and they do not have to live with the consequences of your decisions. This need to crowd source decisions is really just us trying to avoid the emotional labor and responsibility of that decision.
I hate to do it again, but to quote Glennon Doyle, she says, I have stopped asking people for directions [00:06:00] to places they’ve never been. Right?
So when you have a tough decision to make, stop talking to everyone. Everyone has different opinions and it messes with your clarity.
Now here’s what to do instead. You wanna do the 4 step method for difficult decisions.
Step one: define your clarity. You need to define what works for you — what you want to be well, happy, and successful, in that order. One way to do that is to ask your 3 guides. This is a concept by Young Pueblo.
So you can ask your guide #1, your values — what really matters to you. #2, your nervous system — is this fear or excitement in disguise. And #3, what’s that whisper in the background that you’re not willing to bring to the foreground?
You need to define something to work this decision through, and not working through this process is why you can’t make [00:07:00] and commit to decisions because it’s all too vague.
Step two in the method for making difficult decisions is consult aligned advisors. Now, we said one of the mistakes people make when trying to make tough decisions is asking everyone, and we say, absolutely, don’t do that. Do not crowdsource, but you can consult select aligned advisors. Talk to 1 to 3 people max.
Choose people who, one, believe in you. Avoid people who don’t see your vision or potential. Two, choose people who align with your values and decision making style. Don’t pick people who are super conservative when you’re a risk taker, right? Doesn’t make sense. Three, choose people who won’t project their fears and values or their dreams onto you, but want you to be happy, well, and successful on your own terms.
Then when you talk to your advisors, don’t ask, what should I do? This is outsourcing your power, and no one can ever answer what you should do because they’re not you.
Instead, this is what you wanna do. Go to your advisor, explain the decision you need to make. Explain the different options, share your values, share your goals, and then give them an indication of what way you’re leaning.
I think I am gonna take the job. I think I am gonna stay where I am and try to make moves here. Let them know where you stand.
Then ask them, is there anything you’d add to what I’ve just explained to you? And do you have any wisdom to offer? [00:08:00]
This sets up your advisors to add perspective, not directives, and it ensures you’re not giving away your power to the general public. It’s through very selective advisors with very pointed questions that are designed to add things you might not be seeing, instead of telling you what to do as a substitute for your own judgment.
Step three is to get clear again. Go back to your own clarity. Get re-grounded in what you need to define what works for you and what you want to be well, happy, and successful.
And lastly, step four: commit to the clarity. So whatever clarity you’ve defined, commit to it. Decide you’re going to meet whatever gap that clarity has created and that you’re going to rise to the challenge.
That might mean reading books, making lifestyle changes, learning new skills, or saying no to things that no longer fit. Committing to the clarity means leveling up, not making the first mistake of lowering the clarity to [00:10:00] your comfort level.
Now, this is a process. It might not be one action, especially for tough decisions with big clarity, right? It’s gonna be a process of what we need to do to close that gap to that new level of clarity.
Commit to the process.
So that’s the 4 steps to making tough decisions.
Now, I’d like to share a story with you of one of my clients who showed up at my door because they were stuck in a really tough decision. And you can find this testimonial on my website.
This client wanted to shift careers from marketing to early childhood education. She had always wanted to be in early childhood education, but went into marketing because it was the more solid choice.
So she was clear, though, that she was gonna make that leap. But when she gave notice to her marketing job, her company offered her a huge promotion and a [00:11:00] raise. It was the career achievement she had dreamed of in the marketing field.
Now with the choice between the dream marketing career and finally living the dream of doing early childhood education, she was spiraling. She kept going back and forth. One day she was staying in marketing, the next day she was going into early childhood education, the next day marketing, the next day early childhood education. She could not land on a decision that felt right, and she could not commit.
So then she showed up to me to help try to figure out how to make this decision.
And what we did was we worked on her values. So again, we gave her something to work the decision through — some sort of criteria system for the clarity.
We did the values exercise and boom, it clicked so fast. She realized she had been prioritizing financial security over fulfillment because [00:12:00] that’s what she was taught, not because it was true for her. And she was not in a position where she needed to put financial security over fulfillment anymore.
So her clarity was fulfillment came before financial security. So she turned down the promotion, stayed enrolled in her training, and started a new chapter.
When we checked in together, it was 3 months in. She said she was busier than ever. She has 2 kids, was in school, and doing part-time work, but she said she had never felt more grounded and more at peace.
And what was so interesting is being so busy — busier than she had ever been before — she said all the anxiety she used to have was gone. That was really shocking to me.
So she did this really brave and bold thing, giving up this whole successful career that was about to go to the next level, doing this [00:13:00] really different path that was new and challenging and overwhelming. And her anxiety was gone.
That’s what happens when you rise to the challenge of the clarity. The clarity gave her the courage to make this decision for herself and commit to doing what she wanted with deep commitment and contentment in her choice.
That’s the power that clarity can bring to our decisions and our life.
So that’s it. That’s all for this episode. I hope you are starting to see that you can make tough decisions a lot faster and with a lot more commitment.
But before you leave today, I wanna ask you: what’s your one takeaway from this podcast episode? Take a moment to identify a key learning that’s changed or expanded your mindset, or giving you a new tool, or giving you something new to practice. I want you to pause and really think about this because this [00:14:00] podcast is about helping you get real results in your life.
My takeaway for this episode is rise to the clarity. Ugh, that’s always the issue with my tough decisions. I know what’s right for me. I can feel the clarity, but I get uncomfortable. So I lower the clarity to meet my comfort level. And no matter how far I’ve come on this — and believe me, I have come a long way — I can always practice more.
Now it’s your turn to pick your learning.
Stay tuned for our upcoming series of episodes on playbooks as the compass for your journey to fulfillment, whether you’re talking about your business, your career, or your personal life.
Thank you for tuning in to the Pocket Ninja Podcast, where big picture wisdom meets practical tools.
If this episode has sparked something in you and you want to ignite your inner [00:15:00] ninja in business, career, and personal life, go to http://www.pocketninjastrategies.com to book a complimentary Clarity Conversation — your inner ninja.
Well, thank you. Later.
Disclaimer: This podcast is designed to help you unleash your inner ninja because we want you to experience wellbeing, happiness, and success altogether. That said, the ideas and insights shared here are not customized to your unique circumstances, and therefore are not a substitute for personalized professional advice.
You are the expert in your own life, career, and business. So take what you learn here with your own discernment and discretion. Only you know what’s right for you, what feels empowering, and what risks you are ready to take on.
Ready to go deeper and get clarity on your next level?